I hate golf. A good walk spoiled(被糟蹋的美好散步)? The whole day spoiled, more like. As with many cases of hate, it has its roots in(根源在于) love. You see, I just love the feeling of hitting the ball sweetly(甜脆地、精准地). If you feel the same way, then you’re into golf(你迷上了高尔夫); if you don’t, then you’re not. But I am, and from the moment I struck a ball sweetly for the first time, I was hooked(上瘾的、着迷的). It happened playing my first proper round of golf, off the third tee(发球台) at the Gower Golf Club. Woomph(砰（拟声词）). Making hardly a sound and barely seeming to make an impact as club hit ball, off it went.(球杆触球时几乎没发出声响，似乎也没造成什么冲击，球就飞了出去。) And that was me.
我恨高尔夫。有人说高尔夫是“被糟蹋的美好散步”？要我说，是糟蹋了一整天。和许多仇恨一样，这份恨意根植于爱。你看，我就是爱那种把球击得又甜又脆的感觉。如果你也有同感，那你就是高尔夫的人；如果没有，那你就不是。而我正是前者，从我第一次甜脆地击中球的那一刻起，我就上瘾了。那是在高尔高尔夫俱乐部第三洞发球台，我打第一场正式球的时候。砰。球杆触球时几乎没发出声响，似乎也没造成什么冲击，球就飞了出去。那一刻，我就沦陷了。
My logic ran that(我的逻辑是) if I could play like that as an absolute beginner, imagine what I could do with a bit of practice. I strode(大步走（stride 的过去式）) up to my ball on the fairway(球道) and, swinging with great confidence, played an air shot(打了个空杆). Missed it completely. Pretending this was but my practice swing, I tried again, and this time made contact with(接触到) the ball, but mostly with the ground, causing lasting damage to the fairway. The ball advanced all of six inches(足足六英寸). Welcome to golf.
我的逻辑是：如果作为一个彻头彻尾的新手都能打成那样，那稍微练练还得了？我大步走到球道上的球旁，信心满满地一挥——结果打了个空。完全没碰到球。我假装那只是试挥，又试了一次，这回碰到了球，但主要是砸在地上，把球道砸出一道久久不消的伤痕。球前进了整整六英寸。欢迎来到高尔夫。
That a complete novice can hit a proper shot is both the best thing about golf and the worst.(一个彻头彻尾的新手也能打出一记好球，这既是高尔夫最妙的地方，也是最糟的地方。) It draws you in(把你吸引进去), giving you great encouragement. But it also drives you nuts(把你逼疯) when, unaccountably(莫名其妙地), you suddenly can’t do it. Other skills aren’t like this. Take the piano. To play even just the slow opening bit of Beethoven’s Pathétique Sonata(贝多芬《悲怆奏鸣曲》) would take years of practice. Nobody ever sat at a piano, with no experience, and on day one played anything resembling(任何像……的东西) Beethoven. Yet in golf, it is kind of possible(多少是可能的). And it’s equally possible, moments later, to find yourself quite incapable of doing anything of the sort(完全做不出那种事).
一个彻头彻尾的新手也能打出一记好球，这既是高尔夫最妙的地方，也是最糟的地方。它把你吸引进去，给你极大的鼓励。但它也会把你逼疯——莫名其妙地，你突然就打不出来了。别的技能不是这样。拿钢琴来说。哪怕只是弹贝多芬《悲怆奏鸣曲》开头那段慢板，也得练上好几年。从没有人毫无经验地坐到钢琴前，第一天就能弹出任何像贝多芬的东西。可在高尔夫里，这多少是可能的。而同样可能的是，片刻之后你发现自己完全打不出那样的球了。